Boredom is becoming a forgotten skill.

I suspect it’s being left behind in favor of immediate gratification. I see so many people (myself included) who have unconsciously trained their brains to constantly be occupied. Think about it - when you have a moment of rest, an unplanned minute, what do you do? Do you reach for your phone? Or do you just sit there?

Although the addictiveness of modern day media certainly plays a role, I think it’s more of a symptom than the cause. I argue that we’re leaving boredom by the wayside because we’re afraid of it. And that fear is what fuels the creation and success of products like TikTok and the modern day pressure to work work work.

Boredom is scary. Who knows what you might stumble upon? It’s a mindset ripe for self reflection, which can be deeply fear inducing. It’s a very natural human instinct to think about ourselves - our survival depends on it - but now we don’t need to spend time monitoring our hunger and comfort levels. We have unlocked “meta thinking,” self reflection.

I think a lot of people are unknowingly trepid about it because you can go down thought paths like confronting one’s own mortality, or times you’ve failed to live by your values, or (perhaps scarier) realizing you don’t know what your values are.

It’s not just the little moments of boredom that are falling by the wayside. I have a theory that there are two main types of boredom: situational and voluntary. Situational boredom is the type that happens during transition periods or whenever the current activity fades. Voluntary boredom comes about with an element of intention, generally larger chunks of unstructured time. (Note: Boredom that occurs during procrastination does not count, because even though you don’t feel adequately entertained, you’re still mentally committed to some task.)

So what about truly unstructured time? Time where you don’t have something to occupy your mind with? It’s no secret that the best ideas often appear as shower thoughts or just-before-sleep thoughts. There’s nothing you’re supposed to be thinking about or external prompts to guide your thinking during these times. (Note: doing something menial, like showering or dishes, is often not mentally demanding enough to count as boredom prevention. I have a whole separate monologue to offer on the value of menial physical tasks.) As kids that’s when we get creative. When we’re not staring at iPads, we immerse ourselves in elaborate imagined worlds or design physically impossible inventions or watch raindrops race down the window. (When was the last time you read the back of a bottle while in the bathroom?)

It’s the same for adults. It’s just even harder for us to be bored, given our increased control over our time. As we get older, the pressure to be involved in commitments increases. We find ourselves swimming in a general lack of free time, busy with work, kids, laundry, etc. Technology is not helping this trend. It’s dangerously hard to say no to, especially since society has ascribed external value to time spent engaged with it. Same with work - we work for money, for success, and because that’s just what you’re supposed to do (says society).

Boredom is thrown by the wayside as a result. We’re afraid to spend time being bored because what if nothing comes of it? What value does it add to your life? I argue it results in creativity, mental fortitude, more solid identities, new hobbies…. The list goes on.

Granted, much of this is from an American perspective. I can’t speak for the truth of these observations in other cultures. In fact, now that I think about it, the cultures and countries known for prioritizing free/rest time are also the ones that I associate most closely with the arts. Take Italy as a prime example. The country is known for producing incredible artists and incredible food. They’re also known (at least in terms of cultural stereotypes) for prioritizing relaxation, “la Bella vita”. (Italy isn’t the only country that comes to mind when observing this correlation, think South America…) I don’t think that’s a coincidence.

When I personally think of America, I don’t think of art. I think of bustling work lives. What would happen if we scrapped the supposedly-productive-but-realistically-not work time and replaced it with boredom?

How much value do you ascribe to free time? Would the ideas and thoughts that come from unstructured thinking time be valuable enough for you to intentionally seek such time?